性行為的發展

發展階段: 老年期的性行為發展

性別角色行為的發展

人們常常會觀察到，隨著年歲的增長，老年夫妻開始顯得彼此相似了。說他們相似不是意指他們的身體外貌相似，而是指他們的大體氣質、他們對待彼此的方式和他們對所處環境做出的反應相似。從外表上看，他們的性別差異可能依然顯而易見；不過，隨著歲月的流逝，他們相互逐漸深化了彼此的適應關係，雙方之間營造了一種特殊的默契，而且弱化了一些從前的那種過度顯現的女性氣質和男性氣概的特徵。當然，決不是所有的夫妻都是如此，而且這種特徵性的改變對獨居者幾乎並不適用。儘管如此，這種觀察結果再一次指向了早前我們所提及的一個事實：甚至於人生早期如此這般確立的性別角色，這種對所有後續的社會行為構成基礎條件的性別角色，在成人期可能和常常會得以調整，並且這個調整的過程有非常充分的理由可以延續到老年期。一旦孩子長大了和離開了家，許多父母會重新調整他們的勞動分工。此外，還有一個額外的因素可能會對性別角色產生一定的影響，即從常規的勞動崗位退了休。這種為追求個人興趣愛好而新獲得的閒暇，可能就意味著女性會開始迎接新挑戰，她們或自願參與公益工作，或進入某類老年大學做學生。另一方面，老年男人可能更喜歡呆在家裏下廚、清掃與整理房間和從事一些業餘愛好活動。或者，老年夫妻可能會共同平等地從事一項全新的事業。即使到了老年期，性別角色仍可能以多種方式發生變化，並且這些變化也可以影響男/女的相互關係。的確，摒棄早期的行為模式和為自我改寫傳統的社會行為腳本的能力，至少在人的性的範圍內，對於從成人期向老年期的成功過渡可能是至關重要的。例如：想要延續幸福的最大障礙也許就是要求男人總應該採取主動，以及在做愛期間男人“被動”是一種不得了的錯誤的認識。反過來，老年婦女可能擔心，如果她們主導和主動發起各種性活動，會有失女性的文雅。如果沒有了這樣的禁忌，上了年紀的夫妻可能更容易獲得性滿足。

Stages of Development: Old Age

Gender Role

It has often been observed that old couples begin to resemble each other as the years and decades go by. This does not mean their physical appearance as much as their general bearing, their overall attitude, the way they react to each other and to their surroundings. Externally, their gender differences may be as obvious as ever, but their gradually deepening mutual adjustment has, over time, created a special balance between them and a softening of some formerly overly pronounced feminine and masculine traits. Of course, this is by no means true of all couples, and it hardly applies to those who live alone. Still, the observation again points to a truth mentioned earlier: Even the gender roles, so early established and so basic to all subsequent social behavior, can be and often are modified in adulthood and this process of modification may very well continue in old age. Many parents readjust their division of labor once their children have grown and left home. An additional factor may be the retirement from the regular work force. The new freedom to follow one’s interests can mean that the woman takes up new challenges in volunteer work or as a student at some college or university. The man, on the other hand, may prefer to stay home cooking, cleaning, and pursuing some hobby. Or the couple may embark on a whole new enterprise together as equals. Even in old age, gender roles can still change in many ways, and these changes may also affect female/male relationships. Indeed, the ability to abandon earlier behavior patterns and to rewrite traditional scripts for oneself may be crucial to a successful transition from adulthood to old age, at least in the sphere of human sexuality. For example: One of the greatest obstacles to continued happiness may be the demand that the male should always take the initiative, and that there is something wrong with a man’s “passivity” during lovemaking. Conversely, older women may fear to lose their femininity if they take the lead and initiate erotic variations. An aging couple is more likely to find satisfaction without such inhibitions.