Development of Sexual Behavior

Stages of Development: Childhood

“Sexual Response” 1

John the Baptist and Jesus as children Popular motive in European Renaissance art. Here after a painting by Jos van Cleve (1464-1540).

Between the ages of one and two, children begin to explore their bodies. As they discover various pleasurable sensations, they usually also begin to play with their sex organs. By the age of two, some children have experienced orgasm, and by age five, nearly half of all children have had this experience. They may also embrace and kiss other children. Indeed, if they are not interfered with, they may fondle and explore the sex organs of their playmates, including their siblings. Generally speaking, boys are more active in this respect than girls. However, most often this kind of mutual exploration (“playing doctor”) is motivated by simple curiosity about the body and its functions and has no erotic character in the adult sense. This is true even when he children try to simulate coitus, taking turns in playing an “active” and “passive” role. These are, more than anything else, attempts to learn something about oneself and others. Still, as children grow older, they may derive an evermore “special” pleasure from the stimulation their sex organs, and their “sex play” with others may become increasingly sensual in character. Older children may even “fall in love”, develop crushes and form very close relationships. The new, “special friends” may be of the other or of the same sex. None of this is necessarily problematical. It is important, however, that the parents maintain a close bond with their children and remain comfortable when explaining various body parts and their functions. Children as young as five want to know “where babies come from” and need truthful answers to many other “sexual” questions. At the same time, they need some space for practical experimentation. Thus, with the help of understanding and supportive parents, children gradually develop into “sexual” beings who will become ready for deliberate erotic behavior.