8
The time to inform your accountant that you've been
depreciating your slave as personal property is not after
you've gotten the audit notice from the IRS. Don't allow
the professional to get sandbagged when something goes
wrong; if there's any chance that your sexual or lifestyle
practices could be relevant to the work she's doing for you,
you'll have to come out to her. The information needed by
the professionals you hire is determined by their need to
know. Neither your physician nor your accountant needs
to know that handling nickel-plated ankle fetters gives
you an instant erection. Your physician may need to know
about how tightly you wear them, especially considering
that funny rash just on your ankles. Your accountant may
need to know what you paid for them and why you think
it's deductible. Your dentist would have to explain why
she is asking about anklewear.
When dealing with other professionals, you will use
most of the same skills and techniques we've already
discussed in this book. Explain simply and straightforwardly
what you do and what relevance it might have to the
professional's work. If you feel like answering a few
good-natured but personal questions, that's fine; if the
questions seem too personal or intrusive, it's also fine to
ask politely, ""How does that relate to my concerns?" Do
make sure that the question-and-answer period is "off
the meter" nobody should have to pay $200/hr. for the
privilege of educating their attorney or accountant.
Most professions have standards of confidentiality
that are comparable to those of physicians. However,
it's a bad idea to put your attorney or accountant in a
position where knowing certain information can handicap
him in advising you. If you are committing a crime, the