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during her pelvic exam. And then there are the patients
who show up in my waiting room crossdressed in a see-
through shirt and nipple rings, and happily assure the
elderly couple waiting to see my colleague that "everybody
loves Dr. Moser." The only way for an ethical health care
practitioner to respond to such behavior is with a polite
but firm insistence that it stop.

Physicians today are the targets of many lawsuits,

some over mistaken sexual intentions. Perhaps the best
way to alienate your physician is to place him or her in
a situation where sexual intent can be ambiguous. Most
physicians have had passes made at them, and most know
how to politely decline. Nonetheless, it is not always clear
how to respond, and medical school does not teach this
aspect of care very well.

If you feel any sense of sexual unease with your health

care practitioner, it's time for a frank discussion. Whether
or not your discomfort has a factual basis, letting him
know that you're feeling uncomfortable can help guide
him toward taking care of you in a way that feels better
to you.

I often have female patients who request to be nude,

dispensing with sheets and gowns, during their exam;
they feel that this choice humanizes the exam, makes
it less clinical and enabling the practitioner to treat the
patient holistically. For many, this is a comfortable and
empowering experience. Others, unfortunately, feel
intimidated by a fully dressed man examining a naked
female, and may feel ashamed of what they see as a
"political" failure; when I sense their ambivalence and
offer them a cover, they refuse and go on feeling unhappy.
An uncomfortable patient makes for an uncomfortable